Are you an introvert? If you are, you have some kind of different needs than an extrovert has. Introverts do not chase the same things as extroverts do. They are not always on the lookout for the next party. Nor do they constantly need others to entertain them. Many nights, they are content to hang out at home, for instance, reading a book, watching a movie, or just puttering around on their own terms. What can quickly wear them out are loud bars, parties, as well as busy schedules.
Sadly, introverts may also feel like they cannot say what they need to say. Sometimes, they just don’t have the words; the thoughts tumble around in their heads, but they do not come out the way they intended to. Or, they may also feel like they have to hide their needs from other people. In this society which favors the extrovert’s way, it is tough to say, “I need some time for myself.” But, this can also leave introverts feeling unhappy, as well as drained and unfulfilled.
Here, we are going to present you the 12 things introverts absolutely need, in order to be happy. What would you add to this list?
1. Time to wind down after a busy day.
This is an absolute must. As a result of biological wiring, introverts are very sensitive to stimulation and process information deeply. Time to unwind will allow them to fully comprehend the events of a busy day, as well as lower their stimulation level to one that is more comfortable and sustainable.
2. Meaningful conversation.
Introverts are people that cannot survive on a diet of small talk alone. It won’t be enough to ask them: “How was your day?” or “How ’bout this weather?” They usually tend to dive deep, both in their interests and relationships. They will need something more than that: What is one new thing you have learned lately? How are you a different person today than you were 10 years ago? Does God really exist? Of course, not every conversation has to be a deep one. Sometimes, introverts really do just want to know what you did this weekend. But, occasionally, in order to feed their minds and souls, they will need those wide – awake – at – midnight – can’t – stop – talking kind of moments.
3. Comfortable silences.
On the flip side, introverts will also need people in their lives that are content with quiet. They will need people that can sit in the same room with them, not talk, each of them doing their own thing. People that will not nervously jump to fill a pause in the conversation, but will let thoughts linger, waiting until each idea has been fully digested. When introverts say that silence can be beautiful, you should believe them.
4. Some space, in order to dive deep into their hobbies and interests.
For example, 17th-century horror novels or Celtic mythology, restoring old cars or gardening, painting, cooking or writing. If it is out there, introverts are doing it. Having the time, as well as the space to dive deep into their interests is recharging. But, it is about more than just doing the thing. It is actually about slowing down and entering a state of flow – this may come naturally for introverts. Bonus: They end up becoming experts in their areas of interests.
5. A quiet, calm space which is all theirs.
Sometimes, they do not have it. But, the dream is real: A room to be alone in. a room to arrange however they like to. A room which has a door that closes out the world even just for a little while. For introverts, having a space that is all theirs will make an incredible difference in terms of their energy levels. Being alone, truly alone, without fear of intrusion or interruption, is feeling, as well as invigorating on a nearly spiritual level.
6. Time to think before responding.
There is hardly anything more stressful than an impatient boss or spouse that stands before them, demanding an answer right now. For extroverts, it is usually very easy to spout something off. But, it is not like that for introverts, as they may rely more on long-term memory than working memory. For extroverts, it is the opposite. Sometimes, all that an introvert needs are a few (pressure – free) beats, in order to reach into their memory and pull out just the right words that they want. You should give them that time. It will be worth, believe us.
7. Friends who understand that sometimes they will stay at home.
Introverts will not attend every party or get – together, as they do not enjoy socializing, but it is all about dosage. They also need friends that will understand that sometimes they just cannot “people” anymore today. These friends that once introverts have had downtime, they will be up for another (laid – back) adventure.
8. A deeper purpose to their work.
A lot of introverts want a job that is more than just a paycheck. It is sure that they have to pay their bills, but they want their 9 – to – 5 efforts to feel worthwhile too. They also want to know that they are helping other people. They want to know that they are making at least some small difference in the grand scheme of things. If introverts just punch in and punch out, doing routine work which does not seem to fit a wider goal, life will feel hollow.
9. Permission to not explain sometimes.
Sometimes, introverts just don’t have words. They may be feeling something strongly, but they cannot describe it. Or, they need to be alone right now, but they do not have the energy to provide a lengthy explanation. When an introvert says, “I do not want to talk about it,” or simply, “This is what I need,” let that suffice. After some time to process, they will likely come back to you with more words.
10. Time and space to work uninterrupted.
It is not a surprise that introverts do their best work alone. Unluckily, our offices and classrooms are not geared toward quiet reflection. As a result of that, you may find them sneaking away to the abandoned corners of the office building. They will even come early or stay late. Or begging to stay in the classroom — where it’s quiet and empty — during recess. To all teachers, as well as supervisors and parents – give introverts the quiet space that they need to think. You may find that you get higher quality work in return.
11. Their tribe.
Rarely being the ones that chase popularity, introverts often have just a few close friends – and they prefer it that way. However, you should note that the key word is “close.” For introverts, friendship is not just about occupying the same space, doing the same activity. Nor is it about trading gossip. It is also about finding a kindred spirit, a person that will peek into the inner world of the introverts – and reveal theirs in return.
12. Time to slow down.
It is time to slow down, as well as breathe. Take it all in and just be. Repeat all of this.